Sunday, May 17, 2015

fast



My dawn....when she was 8 months old. Now she's 3 years and 4 months. How could time fly so fast? How could that happen? I can see her everyday thinking nothings changing then all of a sudden she'd grow up and changed. Old pictures really gives us lots and lots of stories, memories and teachings.

 I read in a magazine that when you are a mother, days are long and years are fast. True. and as I look at this photo...it made me think if i had hug, kiss, cuddle, love and even bite my dawn when she was at that age? I think I did. I believe I did. But my mother's instincts is telling me that I hope I can do all of it all over again....

My love, please don't grow up so fast.





mama

It's 11:28pm.if I am at home, I would havebeen sleeping by now.I can imagine my dawn putting her arms around my neck, her face so close to me that I could smell her fresh breath. Gosh I miss my little daughter....so where am I?

I'm here in the hospital, at marikina valley with my mama. The nurse let me sign her consent early this evening for her thoracostomy tomorrow. She asked me to indicate how am I related to her and I wrote on the consent form the word niece....she taught I am her daughter. She was not the first one.

I grew up with my mama.since my younger sister has cerebral palsy where she needs to stay at the hospital most of the time, my mom left I locos to stay here in manila.she left me too. I have a pleasant childhood because of my nama.when I was in kinder, I remember that every morning before we go to school, I would ask her to buy me a new pencil. She would oblidge. Yes I am spoiled and not.at night after praying we would sing songs before we go to sleep. The next day, I would throw tantrums if I would wake up without her by my side....

And that made me think last night...when was the last time that mama and I was together?

I don't want to miss you mama because I want to be always by your aide. So please God, extend your healing hand to my mama so that we can still be together. if you can, take away some of my hours, days, or even years of living on this planet earth and add it to her life.I love my mama so much Lord. Please heal her.......