merry CHRISTMAS!

paskong pasko na nga! happiness....

MERRY CHRISTMAS sa nag iisang follower ko! love you papa j! =D

memories...

yesterday, my husband allan, my daughter summer and i went to amang rodriquez memorial hospital for our yearly gift giving.my daughter summer, after i gave birth, has been confined there for almost a month and since she got well, now alive and very healthy, we decided that every summer's birthday would be a gift giving day.we didn't actually go there on the dot on her birthday because it was last december 10 but we went there yesterday. entering the hospital wraps me up with memories and because of that, i was not able to contain myself. i was smiling outside but i was crying inside. tears of contentment and joy.i was thanking God on our way for giving us our precious baby girl =D

today, as i was surfing my facebook profile, i was able to see a shout-out that totally changed my mood for the day. it was able my ex-boyfriend who finally found someone. i don't know if i am supposed to feel this way but honestly, i am not happy. the first thing that came into my mind was to block my ex's profile. my friend AJ told me that when you block someone else's profile, it will not appear on their wall. safe. but, i asked myself, why would i block his profile? answer: so that i won't be updated with his sweet shout outs and then i wouldn't be affected anymore. why am i affected? well because for a long time, whenever we get to talk, he always tells me that he still loves me and that it's still me who we wants to be with all his life....ahhh....so there it is....the main reason for my being unhappy is because: i am a selfish bitch and a selfish ex girlfriend! gosh, i hate myself.

city ville =D

BEFORE, i have two reasons why i'm always eager to surf the net everyday of my life.
first, because of facebook. i can get virtual connections to my friends because of facebook that's why i so love it. parang ka-on line relationship ko at once and 1300 plus friends ko. amazing. incredible. addictive.

second, i love to surf on airline promos. before, i would goggle on what's the latest promo on cebu pacific. but not, my passion airline is air philippines. bigger and better. =D who on earth do not want that? hehe

BUT NOW.... i have my third reason...cityville.

my goodness. i never thought i would be this "addicted" in building cities, farming, franchising, visiting other cities, etc. kung sino man ang nakainvent ng city ville, nakakaloka ka. you gave me another reason to sit down, face my computer, increase my electric bill, decrease my quality time with my kids, and increase my time imagining and thinking on how to buy and save for my city. kaloka talaga. well, just like farmville, i know that one day soon, i'll get the snap out of it and forget about this whole thing again. I'd be back on my old silly self..... just like the way it used to be =D

summer's day

today is summer's birthday.

my baby girl is now 2 years old. there goes the cliche again...time flies...before i know it, my baby will be a lady. sometimes, i wish that time would stop so that i could have summer as my baby forever...wishes.

two years ago, after summer was born (December 10,2008) at 11:45pm, her pediatrician approached me and said that she's in critical condition. i was still groggy but i heard her and because of that, i was restless the whole time. i cant go to sleep. i was shocked.

it was after a day that i finally got up out of bed and walked in the ICU so i could see summer. my stitch from the previous cesarean section that i had was so painful and each walk crushes my whole body. i did my best to see her and when i did, the pain from my stitches vanished. it was replaced with pain deep within me. a pain that i couldn't explain and express. my body is not crushing anymore but my heart is. seeing summer with gadgets and tubes makes me want to die.

i still cant forget her endotracheal tube, the oxygen mask, the oxygen tent, the nasogastric tube, so many gadgets that was attached to her so that she could live. the countless x-rays, blood studies, arterial blood gas interpretation, iv insertion that was made for her so that she can be monitored. her facial skin that was peeled off after a plaster was removed still seems vivid to me. her IV insertion scars from her hands and feet still reminds me that my angel, after all of these things, survived and thats a miracle. i could never thank God enough for giving me Summer, His piece of miracle in our lives =D

richie rich

Facebook's newest expression of anti-child abuse is by posting your favorite cartoon character when you were still a child. well, i know that deep within ourselves lie a child like spirit that makes us happy and warm. i love Richie rich. it's one of the reasons why i wanted to go home straight during weekdays. its my alarm clock every 3pm that even when am comfortable lying in bed, i just have to get up and watch it. it is also the time when my mom would come home from school, and we would watch Richie rich together after i make her cup of coffee. She says that i make a perfect cup of coffee. I love the feeling when i can sit down next to my mom because that's the time when i can embrace her all i want. i love Richie rich especially now that whenever i get to see it, it brings some childhood memories in me that can make me smile sweetly. =D

classic

we had our family day today. it was fun and the fellowship that we had we our church mates was worthwhile. the time was well spent except that majority of the structured games do not co-relate with the team building activities that we are supposed to have. 

i think most of the games were games for the mind. the staff concentrated on games such as PUZZLES and PINOY HENYO type, BRING ME (not included in the games for the mind).the games were not appropriate for a group game especially if the group is a family. i think that it would be better if the games were designed for family team building like games for dad and son, mother and daughter, couples, the likes. The games should have an enlightening lesson to be discussed by the staff at the end of each session. in that way, processing will come in easily. I also think that most of the games held can be done indoors, the opportunity to be outdoors was wasted.

well now, you can call me a critique. i am. i am very good in critiquing. its my forte. but, come to think of it, my comments make sense. if you read this, its either you will accept what is written (freedom of expression) or grumble about it. if you choice option two, think again. you might be heading to a blind curve and you dont want that to happen right? =p

adobo =D

i love cooking adobo. sa totoo lang, kung meron man akong specialty na pinagmamalaki ko sa asawa ko, adobo yun. he even told that he will never get tired of eating my home made adobo. inisip ko tuloy, yun na lang kaya ang iluto ko sa araw araw? at least he will go home excited and be happy every dinner time. too bad, adobo is relative sa high blood pressure.

sa buhay natin, kung puro adobo na lang ng adobo ang food intake natin, napaka walang kwenta ng ating magiging 3-day diet recall. our humanness can always lead us to immeasurable boundaries kaya kahit masarap ang isang bagay at naging comfort zone na natin for quite sometime, we should still expand and grow. don't be afraid of growing because growing will always be a part of living. and we should live well enough. hay...adobo...masarap pero hindi dapat madalas =D

3 wishes

i have actually three places that i want go to before i leave planet earth. i saw this picture of my friend playing in the snow and i envy her. therefore, any place where there's snow is a priority. i want to touch a real snow, play with it, eat it (can it be eaten?), hold it, any thing...i want to make my own snowman and take a picture of it. i want a picture of me with a snow angel shadow at my back. sounds so cool. =D

second is the Universal Studios in USA. i want to visit that place...well, my husband told me that we can't afford universal studios in usa for now so he got me settled in universal studios at singapore. okay. that would do.... for now...

third, of course, i haven't even met a person who do not want to go to Disneyland, so its my third option. I would love to go to Disneyland in Orange County California because i know that its the "real" Disneyland and that its bigger, better than the one in Hongkong. nevertheless, i wanna see what Hongkong Disneyland has to offer also. 

well, if i'd have an extra money for my other visits, i would love to go to Hawaii, Mexico, Rome, Israel, Paris, Europe, Atlantis.....whoa! that's a lot! wish i could live long enough to be able to go where i want to go =D

plastic

sick and tired of plastics. they ruin the environment and is very un-mother earth friendly (i don't know if there's such a term). i hate those persons who continue to use plastic and get to be so irresponsible in discarding them. users! i hate global warmers (watch my term,haha!) too. they burn whatever things they wanted to burn. i think the social conscience of other people is slowly deteriorating. growing old isn't always parallel with increased responsibility.

i hate people who are plastic! today i heard so many stories involving my friends from abroad and my friends here in the philippines. technology spreads news like rain. and sometimes the people whom you think you trusted are the same people who don't trust you at all. ironic? no...it's reality. plastic people are everywhere. watch out!

no comments

a ghost has been reading my blog since AJ posted my link on his profile. =D unknown readers. but its okay.a t least my tab is increasing in number. its now 50 plus from 5. what an increase!

dine-in

last friday, after the student's orientation at bsu, we went to YANGSKU for our lunch. i was really starving at the time that we arrived there because it was past 12nn. we patiently waited for the meal for 15 minutes but after 15minutes, there's no sign of our meal yet. the waiter could have informed us about the delay but the staff there weren't courteous enough to do that. it took us 40minutes to finally have the meal on our hands and when we got it, i was not satisfied. rice was cold, chicken didn't taste the way i expected it to be. now i have two options. i will never go and eat at yangsku again or i will eat there but will not other chicken again. i choose option one. 

finally =D

finally, after four attempts, i saw my best buddies choc and aileen. it was such a short, meaningful, lovely and fruitful evening. its always fun being with them. isa lang ang tag line ko tonight....sana maulit muli! =D

i cried.

It was almost 5pm yesterday and we were at Boom na Boom's kulturang pilipino presentation (it's BAPHIL's field trip and we went along =D). everything was fun and enjoyable until we went to the last part of the film showing and that is....the poem entitled "SA AKING PAGTANDA". The poem had a strong impact on me especially now that my aunt, my mom and my dad are already at their senior citizen years. I cried a river...in public. At first i felt awkward but i just have to let it out. After all, my prof once told me that keeping those emotions within you will cause a lot of pain someday (physical pain and emotional pain). It was a nice piece. A piece that kept me contemplating if am making a good job keeping my "old" loved ones happy and loved.

It's 3am today when i opened my facebook account. I saw aileen's note. The internet was kind of slow so while opening it, i was asking myself if its for me or not, and if its not for me, who could she be referring to? does aileen have a new best friend? believe me, my thoughts were faster than the network! When i read it, i was dumbfounded. then, i cried again. what the heck, i miss my best friend! Been with her for almost 20 years now and since she got rich (hehe, i hope she'll smile when she reads this...well i hope she knows that i have a blog!?!) we barely have time to see each other or talk to each other. she's right. i am updated with her because of face book (thank you God for face book). we barely text each other or call each other but nonetheless, i pray for her everyday. Well i hope we can have time to go out again soon to make up for the lost time...

two is four times the work =p

Being a mother is tiring but fulfilling especially when your kids are still toddlers i think, because that's the time when they walk as they run, talk as they demand, eat and be full while not eating anything, and many more of that ....

yesterday was a test of my patience...while i was busy cleaning the kitchen i saw summer and rain just sitting down at the sofa and watching DORA the explorer series. It wasn't an unusual incident but something in me felt that something was going on so i waked quietly to their place and presto! i saw my dental floss, being pulled by summer as rain was busy knotting it at the end of his car! gosh...my poor dental floss.... =c

ironic

i checked my friend requests on facebook and i have many. Most of the pending accounts are from my recent students who failed my subject. well it's not that i don't want to befriend my students or something. I actually have some of them as my friends already. I added my students because i have the fetish of checking my number of friends and i want it to reach 1000. shallow reason. now most of them wants to be my friend so i'm now confused. should i add them? even though they failed in my subject? what if they curse me or get mad at me and it will be seen in my profile. huh...paranoia. familiarity breeds contempt.

my dream

today, i woke up feeling awkward...why? because i dreamed about my ex boyfriend! my goodness...that guy is still haunting me after all these years. siguro type pa nya ako till now, hehehe! ( i just love myself)...well, the dream was that we were together, we had a baby..its a girl and she's beautful. after awhile, there were zombies following us and we have to run carrying our baby girl. we arrived at a church then we decided to part ways. i told him that he can have the baby, after all i already have a baby girl of my own, and he was happy....kakalaro ko din siguro ng plants vs zombies...hay...ex bfs...they come and go... =D

moments

i know its cliche but time really passes so quickly that there are times you just have to sit, relax, take a deep breath and enjoy the moments God gave you.

I am not feeling so good today. well i tried to act naturally, as if nothing bad is happening to me but the force of pain is there and i just can't take it away. am having abdominal cramps and i'm so scared that this cramps will lead to something else. woman's instinct. pre empt =D i was asking myself on my way home from school some morbid questions like, why don't i want to die? well i've contemplated well enough that i arrived at some reasons why i still want to live =D

(1) for my husband. we've been loving each other for nearly 13 years now. i know 13 is sometimes an unlucky number but i don't believe in luck. good thing. my husband has been there for me and i still want to love him the way he had loved me.

(2) for rain and summer. my goodness. my kids are still young. rain is 3 and summer will be turning 2 this december. sometimes i get to think...i should have been pregnant when i was younger so i can still enjoy running, playing, crawling, reading with these kids. well, God really has His own time.

(3) for my family. i love my dad and my mom sooooo much. i think i haven't done enough to make them so happy so i still want to live longer and be a part of the happiness they deserve. i love my parents so much. whenever i would pray to God about them, i want to cry. though its not man's destiny to live forever, i want my parents to live forever.

(4) for my fourth reason, well i haven't think of any yet....and i think this will be a good reason for me to live longer...so that i could enumerate more reasons for living =D how's to that???

my abdomen is still hurting but i feel better now. =D

like it...

i like this day not because it was not an extraordinary day but because it was an ordinary day =D i've been expecting so much with so many people lately and most of the feedback personalities that i get is not what it seems to be. marami na talagang plastic sa mundo. salamat naman at hindi pa ako nagiging isa sa kanila. i remembered my friend gigi in ceu, she would always remind me that plasticity is a virtue...partly correct, partly not.

its now 1am and i just wish i could go to sleep now but no, rain is still bugging me. i told him to sleep now as often as he could, as long as he could because when he grows older, he couldn't sleep as much as he would like to. there'll be lots of things to do...i got home at almost 11pm, had a quick bath, ironed clothes for an hour and here i am now ready to go to sleep. mahirap talagang maging working mom... but its fulfilling =D

first time =D

its my first time! some would say there's always a first time and here it is...my first blog ever! =D thanks to my ever dearest buddy aj who persistently made this possible...